Friday, December 7, 2007

Begrudged

This picture helps to explain my current emotional state

Yes, that (begrudged) is the emotion I feel as I sit at work pondering the subject we were given to speak on in church on Sunday.

My first reaction was that they are only giving us two days to prepare. My second reaction was that I have SOOOO much to do for school right now and then came my third reaction. I can't speak on this subject, it is something I am absolutely horrible at.

The above reactions, in reality, are all just masks for my true feelings ... I HATE speaking in front of large crowds. It is sort of an ironic emotion since I am a business major who has to give at least a dozen presentations a semester. At first I thought it would get easier each time I did it. I was wrong. THEN I thought maybe it would get easier if I practiced my presenting skills. I guess that helped a little. But every time I have to stand up in front of my class or a group I get shaky and my palms sweat and I just don't like sweaty palms.

Our topic we have to speak on is Service and as I stated above ... I am horrible at it. I suppose giving a talk on Sunday is an act of service but like I said ... I am doing it, thus far, begrudgingly. After I gave Ben a list of reasons why I just COULDN'T give the talk he said, "Ok, I'll call them and tell them we can't do it". DAH! Way to make me feel guilty. So I quickly told him to ignore every reason I just gave him and we would do it. I think that kind of through him off. (In reality, I know if we don't do it now I will be waiting in stressful anticipation, jumping at every phone call, every week from now until they call us again to speak ... might as well get it over with).

Anyway, if you have any suggestions, any stories on service, or any quotes I could use ... I would MUCH appreciate it.

4 comments:

Marjorie said...

Chris was going to ask you guys for Thanksgiving weekend. Hmmm, which would you have rathered? I look forward to it, and you can look forward to Jared making faces at you:)

Rachel said...

Only two days notice!? That's lousy. I wouldn't have blamed you for saying no in that case. Good luck. If I think of anything helpful, I'll comment again or email Ben or something...

kelsey said...

Nothing is coming to mind immediately, but even if I did have an idea it wouldn't help to leave it at midnight the night before your talk. Hope it goes well!

Benjipups said...

Plus, you're not horrible at service at all. You do a million things for me all the time. In fact, I just think you're so good at service that you don't realize you're doing it.